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WHEN THE WEIGHT IS TOO MUCH: LEARNING TO CHUCK IT ALL OFF

I’m feeling so exhausted I’m at the point of tears tonight. Five sets of eyes looking to me to care for them – my daughter needing help with math homework after I already did reading with her. My fifth grader needing connection and discipline. My preschooler  needing guidance, language development, and connection. Then there’s Tess, our dog, who’s sick and struggling. Even Rhett, our other furry friend, is hungry and lonely.

And all this while I’m trying to reach my financial goals on pennies. Like, really?

I had to say NO to more today. Just couldn’t pile another thing on. Instead, I got in the shower (my sanctuary, y’all) and listened to Tauren Wells’ “Up,” “Undefeated,” “Supernatural,” and “Something Better.” And something shifted in me.

It hit me – it’s a DECEPTION that I’m losing and struggling. I’ve already won on God’s side! He turns EVERY trial into something better. Pressure builds a diamond. (I even switched to Rihanna’s “Diamonds” after the Tauren Wells set because YES.)

I’m fighting to keep my mind focused on the truth that these problems have already been conquered. There’s already a solution, and I’m just in the waiting, developing stage, about to enter my next season of Canaan. I feel the weight of providing, nurturing, and leading, and it’s NOT reasonable for any human being to bear it all.

So as I feel that pressure, I need to just CHUCK IT OFF. The Bible tells us to cast our anxieties onto Jesus. I’m just gonna chuck those off. Throw them off as fast as I can.

I can’t bear the weight of:

– A car

– A sick dog

– The kids

– The church

– The kids’ schooling

– Ministry

I just can’t. I’m not built for that. Gotta chuck it off.

I can’t do it all. I can’t. HE CAN.

He can do it all. He can solve the problems. He can make it work. He can bring deliverance . He can make all the meetings happen at the last minute.

I can’t be everywhere at the same time. I can’t do it all, and the answer is just NO. No, I can’t. I can’t do it all, and that’s it. He’s gonna make a way. I don’t know a way, because He’s the only one who can.

I’m trying to turn my focus now on how He’s showing up. I made a list of all the blessings and provisions I’ve seen and prayed for Him to give me eyes to see and celebrate each one!  This practice is so uplifting… def try it! 

When I heard some worship songs today, I thought of my personal imagery – especially diamonds. It reminded me of the phoenix again. Pressure builds a diamond, and that diamond bursts forth out of the pressure and becomes a phoenix.

I’m not trying anymore. “Trying” isn’t the right word. I’m SURRENDERING. Surrendering to the stretching, even when it’s hard.

What are you chucking off today? What weight are you carrying that was never meant for your shoulders?

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